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Trvial723 - love pickles

It Doesn't Hurt

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Trvial723 - love pickles

It Doesn't Hurt

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lone orange
It Doesn't Hurt
Every step I take,
I try to remember...
The feeling of the metal diamond,
hot, then cold,
cutting into my bare feet.
The metal rod grating against
my calloused hands
as I climb higher and higher.
The wind pushes against me
blowing bits of sand
into my squinted eyes.
My knees ache and
every time I take a
step I can feel the
joints creaking, protesting.
My jeans don't fit right;
I hold them up with a
bit of wiry rope.
I don't remember where I
got my shirt; it's been far
too long....
The people on the streets
keep walking
The don't notice me.
They never do.
My hair is tangled.
I don't own a brush.
Maybe I did...once...
My hand touches the metal door handle,
cold to the touch.
My whole body moves
with the effort of opening it.
I haven't eaten in six days.
As it swings open,
it hit s my toes.
Sharp pain shoots up my leg
The surprise of it brings
tears to my eyes.
My foot burns as the
toes leak my blood.
It falls through the diamond-holes
onto the dirty cement below.
Stepping inside, the stone floor
is smooth and cold.
More stairs reveal themselves
and I start to climb once more.
I find another door and pull it open.
Breathing hard, I wipe my eyes.
I'm on the rood of a building.
Paint cans and dead birds are
nestled in the corners.
I feel the sand blowing into
my eyes and wounded toes as I walk
toward the edge.
I sit, my legs over the edge.
and take a deep breath.
The wind seems to urge me
forward. I swing my legs
and drop.
I close my eyes to protect
them, though I'm not sure why.
I don't feel fear, no regrets.
No one will cry for me...
I feel suddenly free
and I grin even as I hit
the cement. I hear
a car driving past,
and I feel warm as
though someone has laid
a quilt over me to help me sleep.
I can't breathe anymore.
I know my eyes are open,
but I can't see.
The sound of that last
car echoes, growing
fainter and fainter.
Suddenly, I feel the
metal diamond of the fire
escape, first hot, then
cold, cutting into my bare
feet....but...it doesn't
hurt anymore.

March 12, 10:28 am
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